I'm thinking a lot about my ex-boyfriend who didn't like tha..
Added 2023-08-11 18:28:29 +0000 UTCI'm thinking a lot about my ex-boyfriend who didn't like that I was a sex worker. He held quite traditional beliefs really, that men should swoon women and take care of them, that connecting with her mind is the path to her pussy, that women are childbearing muses. I liked that for a little while, it was refreshing that he wanted to get to know me before fucking me. But my whole life I've been taught that my value comes from men and whether or not I am fuckable, even before entering this industry. After a while I began feeling uncomfortable with my ex because he rarely pursued me sexually. He threw that comment back at me, too, but I think because we hadn't nurtured each other's sexualities there wasn't much of an interest there. I'd almost forgotten how to seduce and how to be sexy. Well, I'd forgotten how to be myself and so I no longer felt seductive or sexy. He argued that I channel most of my sexual energy into my work and that's why it lacked in the relationship, but I don't believe this to be true. I do channel my sexual energy into my work but I feel I have it in abundance. Sex work, particularly OnlyFans, has taught me so much about my feminine power, especially how vast it is, and I'm able to distribute it thoughtfully. I'm fortunate to have loyal and communicative subscribers who make me feel like I've got so much to offer. I've been reminded that sexuality is not just physical and that there are multiple elements to my energy that contribute to my allure. I guess what was really happening in my last relationship was that my clients and subscribers made me feel more sexually powerful and secure than he did. I'm sitting with that realisation today. I'm not scared of it, I feel quite lucky. I feel like I'm in multiple relationships with people online and frankly every single one has taught me about what I need in my personal life. Men online have a lot to offer me: money, stability, humour, wit, mentorship, wisdom, comfort, patience. If a man doesn't offer me these things in my personal life then I don't want it. That's fair, right? I guess what I'm saying is, a few of you have set the bar and I'm rather grateful for that. It's fragility and entitlement that concern men if their partner is a sex worker and they are two characteristics that do not turn me on in the slightest.
